Your emotional issues are not normally related to any particular event or circumstance. Your emotions are more likely a result of how you perceive an event or circumstance. Incidents, circumstances, situations and events are meaningless until you give them meaning. If you are going to make any kind of progress in improving your EI, it will be essential to properly identify the problem you are facing and then recognize the role perception and thought play in how you settle on an emotional response.
Too often, even when working with a professional therapist, identifying the problem is not the primary goal. A professional EI guide, however, may ask, after hearing what the learner thinks is h/er problem, “How is it a problem for you?” intentionally placing the burden of change on the learner, purposefully removing others from the problem-solving adventure. (The idea that people treat you unfortunately is only meaningful if you place some level of significance on it and make some sort of inference about it.)