Thinking Differently


Thinking differently, thinking more than once, has always been the toughest part of improving one’s emotional intelligence (EI), especially in the middle of a crisis. Our goal as EI learners, however, is to think twice – maybe not in the midst of a crisis, but at some point soon after.

EI learners know that when A happens, people often think B and feel C; just like they always have. Very little is likely to ever change in that regard. But what EI learners know better than others is that the options at C are not limited to our first thoughts and their consequent emotional responses. We know full well that if we think differently at B we will feel a new, improved emotional response at C. Improved emotional intelligence can help with that second thought.

Think Twice – A Guide to Improved Emotional Intelligence is NOT a guide to thinking positively. If anything, you will learn to give proper consideration to facts over the idea that there is or ever will be anything positive about misfortune. You will NOT learn how to ignore noxious behavior, think positively about it or not “let it bother you.” Think Twice will provide the learner, instead, with a precise method for beginning to make real, measurable improvement in h/er emotional intelligence when addressing real emotional issues in the real world.

Think Twice is a mixture of insight, humor and practical suggestions for starting to live contentedly, even when the EI learner perceives that everyone around h/er is living insanely.

The EI learner will be less dependent on others for h/er own value.

The EI learner will be more capable of making independent, sensible judgments of h/erself, h/er strengths and h/er weaknesses.

The EI learner will have a better understanding of how people make each other feel and begin to use a set of practical, useful and meaningful skills when addressing unmanageable, self-defeating emotions.

With proper focus, the EI learner will come away from Think Twice with greater emotional insight, be quite clear regarding the nature of h/er emotional issues and, with practice, start to live far more contentedly.

Truth be known, enduring, long-lasting and permanent safety from emotional distress may not even be a prospect of wo/mankind. If it isn’t one thing, it’s another. If you win the lottery, you will be worried that time passes too quickly for you to spend it all. Having talent, good looks and charm may lead you to think people are taking advantage of you. Reaching your ultimate goal of enduring, long-lasting and sustained emotional peace may be quickly interrupted with thoughts that your bliss will soon be interrupted by LIFE!

Emotional balance seems to be always just a few steps away, no matter how close you get.

With that in mind, it may be best to view life as an inevitable series of ups and downs – never so good it couldn’t be unpleasant and never so bad that it couldn’t be better. As you progress through Think Twice, you may begin to reconsider your personal definition of happiness.

Finally, if improved emotional intelligence isn’t your goal, you might rely, instead, on the three established rules of enduring, uninterrupted emotional bliss. Unfortunately, I don’t know what they are.

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